“What is the strongest pain to have?
Fighting with fear or fighting with regret”
In all my life I have had fear very present as a strong director of what I choose to do. Often it was a motivator to sharpen my senses, but often it also was a brake to make me not enter into what I wanted to do. We all have a relationship to the word.
I like this definition of fear very well: “Fear: a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid.”
There are more than 365 “fear not” in the bible. We face all face it, and it might be real or imagined. But what do we do with it?
You may have heard:
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14.27
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid: do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. “
As a preschool teacher we often had focus on the feeling of teamwork in our group. The feeling of belonging to something, make an impact, be important both as an individual, but also as an individual in a team. Both is highly important. The environment has so much to say about how we enter into and make others see who we truly are.
We all face fears, and in the meeting of our environment, it may reduce or strengthen what we fear. It actually makes no difference if the fear is real or imagined, because to the one who owns the feeling, it is highly real. In the right environment we feel that we can step out and step up to become who we are made to be. Our strengths have a new room to enter, and our weaknesses has a new room to get modified and to grow into strengths.
We own the choices in our life, and also make the decisions in how to meet the frames around us. Frames when we come to the store and meet the cashier that has had a hard day and might be grumpy. And what do we then do? Our brain will automatically start a chain reaction of how to enter into this situation and put forward the information to our feelings. What we have recorded from past experiences may color how we answer the grumpy cashier, and it will also set the frames for the next customer and also our relationship to this person.
Our will to reflect around who we are and who others are is so important. We all react from a place within us, and if the core of our place is rotted in fear, then it will also color the way our reactions come out if we do not have a brake with reflection to stop it and reevaluate our actions.
But still if we do reevaluate, our core will always bring up what is in the deepts of our soul.
As I started saying: In all my life I have had fear very present as a strong director of what I choose to do. Often it was a motivator to sharpen my senses, but often it also was a brake to make me not enter into what I wanted to do. And the awareness of this has made one of morning habits.
I have for a long time repeatedly been saying the opposite of what I have feared. If fear has knocked on the door and said I cannot do a specific task, then I have made it a habit to repeatedly say to my self that this is going to happen, and I will see it through that it does regardless of the fear will continue to have its hold on my feelings or not. The feeling of fear is not what hinders me. The power lies within the action to not let the fear hinder my life, but to rather take dominion.
As God said to Joshua, He also say to us:
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
Do not be afraid: do not be discouraged,
for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go”
You might have heard about my trip to India in the beginning of last year. I was so afraid of traveling alone abroad. I had only done that once in my life, when I was 15 years old, and it scared me so much to travel to Oklahoma, USA all by myself to visit my aunt and uncle.
But the pain of regret would be stronger than the pain of fear, so I decided to visit my very good friend Alana in India, traveling all by myself, to Dubai, one of the largest airports in the world. And I was scared to death. And on my way from Dubai to India, up in the air, where my phone was not working, I got so scared I thought I would die. But I did not, and my fear did not control me.
I had such an amazing time with my beautiful friend Alana, and we went so many wonderful places and met so many amazing people. The pain of not going would definitely have been stronger than the pain of fear I felt at that time. Now I have no problem with traveling alone.
I made up my mind to make the fear not control where I could or would go.
Another habit of mine is writing down what I want to achieve in life. Then I put this on my daily prayer list and talk it to come to pass. I put it on a paper and decide to walk on water.
What do you mean by that, you might wonder. Well, we all have dreams that we want to see come alive. I have found it to be a powerful action to write things down on paper. I actually am a little old fashion and still like to write certain things on paper, but you can also have the same effect if you chose to write it on your phone, computer etc. It is the declaration of what we want, the clearance of our goals that comes alive. We make a decision to walk on water. Because most of our dreams will one way or the other challenge us. Challenge the core in our life. What comes out from our core, our reactions may be strong and have nothing to do with the topic of our dream, but may be an underlying fear or pain that has to come to the surface in order for us to realize our dreams.
Our willingness to stand firm and our devotion to our dream, determines if it will come alive or not. And it is here we start to walk on water. Enter into new areas of our thinking and start a reaction of new feelings. We enter into new habits, new challenges that require of us to find new knowledge and wisdom. Sometimes our reactions in all this may be so strong that it totally overwhelms all in us and around us. But if we stay put in the fear, the pain in our core, then we will grow through our past experiences who has set its mark on our soul to try to hinder us.
In a public speech on August 28. 1963 Martin Luther once said: “I have a dream…” He realized it. Both for himself and for others.
We too can say: “I have a dream”, and realize it for both our self and others.